Reflection... I'm sitting here thinking how much transition Andrés is going through right now. He's never had a Christmas with commercialism at the forefront. He's eating "crazy" food, hearing new words all day long, different smells, and unique sights...it's amazing how well he's doing with the changes. I'm almost a little scared...it's been too easy. (Knock on wood!) The biggest issue thus far was a conversation on the concept of gratitude and the proper etiquette of opening up a gift. If he's never had gifts to open then I guess this explains why he needs a little lesson!
We've been on the low this holiday season. Spending time at home and not running around. It's nice. He seems content, too! It works for me!
Everyone passes through bad moments, I'm sure we'll have some soon enough. The thing to remember is that this time will proves how resilient , strong, and tough Andrés is inside! He's a good boy. I wouldn't trade this experience for anything! It's amazing where life takes you. A year ago I'd never paint this picture! Anyway... It's pretty "cool" to know that this is where I'm supposed to be in life. It's just "right".
Andrés
Summer 2015
Saturday, December 26, 2009
Friday, December 4, 2009
December 4, 2009
OH YEAH!!!!! Got an email from BVS today saying my letter of offer from Colombia was FEDEXed today!!!! I should get it Monday. This means that things are really rollin'. I can finally forward my I800 and 846W. There actually might be a chance I can go to Colombia on the 13th. ~WOW~ Great way to start the weekend.
Thursday, December 3, 2009
December 3, 2009
Good news! Andrés will be spending 3 weeks here during Christmas break. His flight comes into Buffalo on Dec 19th around 10:30am and he has a return flight on Jan. 13th, 2010. If my paperwork is approved in time I can return with him to finalize the adoption. If not, he goes back alone and waits for me. Speaking of paperwork, I'm still waiting on the 1800A. The good news is it hasn't been returned with errors. The bad news is the approval isn't in the mail yet.
So... Christmas is a big thing. I wonder what I should buy him. Any suggestions? I'm thinking a guitar, camera, DS, and some drawing stuff. His ticket here was over $1,000.00. It wouldn't fly if I told him that being with me is his Christmas gift, would it? (LOL)
It appears that I've covered my bases with getting time off from work to go to Colombia. The good news is we'll be covered with my insurance. The bad news is that I'll be taking an unpaid leave of absence. Yeah... if I'm really gone for a month that is an easy $3 grand. I was hoping to get at least my family sick and personal days. A weeks pay would at least cover the basic bills. It's not fair that adoptive parents are still treated like second class parents in the world today. Non adoptive parents get to use their paid sick days. They totally deserve them, but so do I! GRRR. Maybe I should move to DC and lobby for Adoptive parent's rights.
I feel blessed that so many people are giving me their "handmedowns" for Andrés. Most of these clothes are almost brand new. It is a huge help! Those little details make a big difference. The cool thing (at least for now) is that he's just as happy with used clothes as he is with new clothes. :-)
While he's here I'm looking forward to taking him for a spin on the snow mobile. Maybe doing a little snowboarding and REAL tubing. Not in the stupid city of Niagara Falls. (Where I fractured my foot last summer.) I wonder if there are any cool things playing at Shea's he loves music. I'll have to check it out.
Well, thanks for reading... I'll try to be better at updating this. I didn't think anyone actually read it!
So... Christmas is a big thing. I wonder what I should buy him. Any suggestions? I'm thinking a guitar, camera, DS, and some drawing stuff. His ticket here was over $1,000.00. It wouldn't fly if I told him that being with me is his Christmas gift, would it? (LOL)
It appears that I've covered my bases with getting time off from work to go to Colombia. The good news is we'll be covered with my insurance. The bad news is that I'll be taking an unpaid leave of absence. Yeah... if I'm really gone for a month that is an easy $3 grand. I was hoping to get at least my family sick and personal days. A weeks pay would at least cover the basic bills. It's not fair that adoptive parents are still treated like second class parents in the world today. Non adoptive parents get to use their paid sick days. They totally deserve them, but so do I! GRRR. Maybe I should move to DC and lobby for Adoptive parent's rights.
I feel blessed that so many people are giving me their "handmedowns" for Andrés. Most of these clothes are almost brand new. It is a huge help! Those little details make a big difference. The cool thing (at least for now) is that he's just as happy with used clothes as he is with new clothes. :-)
While he's here I'm looking forward to taking him for a spin on the snow mobile. Maybe doing a little snowboarding and REAL tubing. Not in the stupid city of Niagara Falls. (Where I fractured my foot last summer.) I wonder if there are any cool things playing at Shea's he loves music. I'll have to check it out.
Well, thanks for reading... I'll try to be better at updating this. I didn't think anyone actually read it!
Tuesday, November 10, 2009
November 11, 2009
Wow! It's been over a month since I blogged! So...I've been talking to Andrés via phone. He seems happy. Most of the documents needs have been signed off by NY state and waiting to be sent to Colombia. Some documents expire...so I have to request more. Always something! I asked for Andrés to come here for Christmas. Still waiting how it's going to roll. Besides that... not much new to report.
Friday, October 9, 2009
Saturday, October 3, 2009
October 2, 2009
WOO HOO! I was finally granted permission to speak to Andrés! Got an e-mail with his foster mom's cell number yesterday. I'm planning to call on Sunday. I was told me he was happy to know he will hear from me, he misses me and he is doing horrible in math class. That's my boy! Math. I'll buy him a calculator tomorrow! (LOL)
Sunday, September 27, 2009
September 27, 2009
Starting to getting "impaciente" with this process. I know in the long run it's worth it, but why does it have to be so complicated! I'm glad they keep this program on the "up and up" for the safety of the kids, but really... it's too much. Oh well... as always, I'll just take everything day by day and go from there. Next step: I800 and DS 230.
Monday, September 14, 2009
Thursday, September 10, 2009
September 10, 2009
Paperwork. Yeah! Just getting this stuff notarized, certified, and appostiled. It's a date game. Things expire so I'm sure I'll have to re-submit some of this stuff. People are so nice when you mention adoption. I didn't have to wait in line very long!
Thursday, August 27, 2009
August 27, 2009
Today I had my "crazy girl" eval, as I affectionately call it. I "passed", if you will, with flying colors. Got my second homestudy back. Just waiting for the Gov't to deny my first i800a so I can send in the "good" homestudy. Sounds wrong to say that I'm waiting for it to be denied!
Not much else to report. Still dying to give Andrés a shout out. I really wish I could hear his voice...
Not much else to report. Still dying to give Andrés a shout out. I really wish I could hear his voice...
Monday, August 24, 2009
August 24, 2009
Good news! Something had to be edited in my home study so...it didn't even matter that I forgot to mail it in now. Who would have thought! I was so mad at myself. My social worker told me to wait until the new one arrives and send in the new one with the rest of the stuff. OK... I'm back on track, I think...
August 22, 2009
OMG.... SOB! I'm sitting here organizing my paperwork and binder and what do I find, but two copies of my homestudy. How in the world did I forget to mail this with the 1800a? AHHH!!! I can't believe this is in my room right now and not on someone's desk in Chicago.
I'm going to swear a little more in private now.
I'm going to swear a little more in private now.
August 21, 2009
FBI prints...FEDEXed to WV. I'm just crossing off the "to do list". As they like to say on the farm.... "git er dun"!!!
August 20, 2009
i800a is filled out and mailed in... whoa! Big relief.
$880.00, and 7 hours later... the first major step has been fulfilled.
$880.00, and 7 hours later... the first major step has been fulfilled.
August 17, 2009
Big paperwork meeting today. I needed this kick in the rear to get moving. I have so many papers to fill out. They are for real when they call this the "paperwork pregnancy". Well, at least I can have a beer while I fill out the same 20 questions over and over again!
July 22, 2009
We had a nice morning...breakfast at home. We talked about the future, which room he wanted for his "real" bedroom , what colors he wanted in his room, about school, about sports, about English, about schedules, and about how I find him in Colombia. His concept of me finding him was too funny. Here it goes:
Andrés says- "Linda...when you come to Colombia to get me... just make a right when you get into the town. Then go right at the fountain. Then turn right on the first street. If I'm not on that street playing then just go to the police station and ask the officers for me. They will know where I am."
OK.... how funny was that! The police station? What!
Details of the ride to the airport: Andrés was freaking out! He said "que trafico" "what traffic"...about 30 times on the 290. The poor thing was so afraid he was going to be late. When we got there he showed all the kids his "brag book" and started eating his lunch. I'm not sure why he was hungry...we stopped at McDonalds on the way to the airport. Nervous eater? Anyway... we were asked to be on the news. He was a ham. So cute...telling the reporter that he stayed with me and he had fun. It was all in Spanish, of course.
After the airport. I was ok... emotionally speaking. When he walked away to get in line for his flight my heart started to hurt. Literally there was a pain. I knew I signed up for this so I tried to focus on that. Walking to the car it felt so weird to be alone. Where was his hand, who had my keys, where was I going? I ended up going to lunch with my mom and dad... we were sad, but no tears until I got home and saw his dirty cereal bowl in the sink. I lost it. I'm talking all out crying, with hyperventilating and no vocal cord action at all!!! My phone rang at the most perfect time because I really needed a friend, thanks Mike! I told him I couldn't talk because I was too sad and he told me he'd stay on the phone and cry with me. We couldn't have timed that more perfectly. Once again, I have amazing friends!
So... I cried a little more after the call. After about 2 hours I felt healthy about everything. I'm planning a vacation with my mom to detox, relax and get ready for the next chapter in Andrés' Adoption Adventures. Some massive wine tasting is in order, I think!
Andrés says- "Linda...when you come to Colombia to get me... just make a right when you get into the town. Then go right at the fountain. Then turn right on the first street. If I'm not on that street playing then just go to the police station and ask the officers for me. They will know where I am."
OK.... how funny was that! The police station? What!
Details of the ride to the airport: Andrés was freaking out! He said "que trafico" "what traffic"...about 30 times on the 290. The poor thing was so afraid he was going to be late. When we got there he showed all the kids his "brag book" and started eating his lunch. I'm not sure why he was hungry...we stopped at McDonalds on the way to the airport. Nervous eater? Anyway... we were asked to be on the news. He was a ham. So cute...telling the reporter that he stayed with me and he had fun. It was all in Spanish, of course.
After the airport. I was ok... emotionally speaking. When he walked away to get in line for his flight my heart started to hurt. Literally there was a pain. I knew I signed up for this so I tried to focus on that. Walking to the car it felt so weird to be alone. Where was his hand, who had my keys, where was I going? I ended up going to lunch with my mom and dad... we were sad, but no tears until I got home and saw his dirty cereal bowl in the sink. I lost it. I'm talking all out crying, with hyperventilating and no vocal cord action at all!!! My phone rang at the most perfect time because I really needed a friend, thanks Mike! I told him I couldn't talk because I was too sad and he told me he'd stay on the phone and cry with me. We couldn't have timed that more perfectly. Once again, I have amazing friends!
So... I cried a little more after the call. After about 2 hours I felt healthy about everything. I'm planning a vacation with my mom to detox, relax and get ready for the next chapter in Andrés' Adoption Adventures. Some massive wine tasting is in order, I think!
July 21, 2009
Today was tough.
I told Andrés he could do anything he wanted since it was our last full day. He asked to go to McDonalds for lunch and to go to Chuck e cheese to play some games. We had a fun time. The prize thing is still too much to deal with though. It's like a cult over there...even some parents were a little too "into" picking out a stupid pink spider ring. For real people!
We had my parents, sister, brother in law and aunts over for dinner/dessert to meet/say goodbye to Andrés. We watched a movie about a tigre. It was so sad. Everyone was crying!
My family said good bye my house because I didn't want to have the waterworks show at the airport. Tomorrow is going to be so hard.
Andrés just brought me a magazine. YEAH!!! Let the midnight reading program begin!
I told Andrés he could do anything he wanted since it was our last full day. He asked to go to McDonalds for lunch and to go to Chuck e cheese to play some games. We had a fun time. The prize thing is still too much to deal with though. It's like a cult over there...even some parents were a little too "into" picking out a stupid pink spider ring. For real people!
We had my parents, sister, brother in law and aunts over for dinner/dessert to meet/say goodbye to Andrés. We watched a movie about a tigre. It was so sad. Everyone was crying!
My family said good bye my house because I didn't want to have the waterworks show at the airport. Tomorrow is going to be so hard.
Andrés just brought me a magazine. YEAH!!! Let the midnight reading program begin!
Sunday, August 23, 2009
July 20, 2009
The best part of today was reading before bedtime with Andrés. He was so cute trying to pronounce the words in my "People in Spanish" magazine. He reads all the pages. Including the ones with the ads on them!
July 19, 2009
How fun was today! We went to a Mexican restaurant with my friend Mike and his daughter Lily. Andrés loved the food so much he wrote a note to the cook! It was adorable... this thank you note on a napkin. I think Mike got a sweet picture of it!
After that we went swimming and Andrés played the keyboard with Lily. I took Andrés to my parent's to show off his new music skills. Fun day.
After that we went swimming and Andrés played the keyboard with Lily. I took Andrés to my parent's to show off his new music skills. Fun day.
July 18, 2009
Andrés asked me to be his mom today! It was so sweet how he asked too! I was filling out paperwork at the exit meeting and he asked me what I was doing. I told him "my homework" which was about him. He wanted to know what I wrote about him. I told him I was telling the "people in charge" that he was a really "cool" kid. He gave me a huge hug and asked me if I would be his "mom"!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! ... I didn't cry, but the feeling inside was indescribable. :-)
After the meeting I took Andrés to see his first movie at the Regal. We saw Transformers. I guess it was a good movie for him. 1/2 the movie was just fighting about god know what with no dialog at all! We missed the ending of the movie. Andrés needed a bathroom break!
I'm rating today a 10 out of 10!!!
After the meeting I took Andrés to see his first movie at the Regal. We saw Transformers. I guess it was a good movie for him. 1/2 the movie was just fighting about god know what with no dialog at all! We missed the ending of the movie. Andrés needed a bathroom break!
I'm rating today a 10 out of 10!!!
July 17, 2009
Wake up 8am
We went to Darien Lake today with Janet, Kevin and my Mom. We had a few good hours before the rain started. Andrés lost his money on the roller coaster. I guess I should have held on to it for him. My bad!
My parents had a pizza party and we taught Andrés how to play 6 card golf. (He got a little weird when he lost and wanted to quit.) We worked it out. Thank God! My Dad wasn't happy when Andrés started pouting!
I was a little nervous about Darien Lake today. I spoke to Andrés about walking slow, trying to include everyone on the rides and understanding if he didn't get everything at the exact second he wanted it. The talk helped because his behavior was perfect. Listen to me! OMG... I'll stop writing now!
We went to Darien Lake today with Janet, Kevin and my Mom. We had a few good hours before the rain started. Andrés lost his money on the roller coaster. I guess I should have held on to it for him. My bad!
My parents had a pizza party and we taught Andrés how to play 6 card golf. (He got a little weird when he lost and wanted to quit.) We worked it out. Thank God! My Dad wasn't happy when Andrés started pouting!
I was a little nervous about Darien Lake today. I spoke to Andrés about walking slow, trying to include everyone on the rides and understanding if he didn't get everything at the exact second he wanted it. The talk helped because his behavior was perfect. Listen to me! OMG... I'll stop writing now!
July 16, 2009
I'm so ready to ditch the crutches. This is getting old. They annoy me. The black and blue mark on my foot is beyond gross. The ripped off skin is starting to itch. It kills!!!!
Anyway...I can't believe my little guy will be gone in a week. I'm getting sad.
We played dominos with Aga. It was fun. We had Chinese take out, too. Nice night. I think Andrés was cheating, though. We busted him! I noticed that he doesn't like to lose. He quits if he knows there is no way to come in first place. That's not going to fly when he plays with friends. I don't want him to have that reputation. Not cool. :-(
Anyway...I can't believe my little guy will be gone in a week. I'm getting sad.
We played dominos with Aga. It was fun. We had Chinese take out, too. Nice night. I think Andrés was cheating, though. We busted him! I noticed that he doesn't like to lose. He quits if he knows there is no way to come in first place. That's not going to fly when he plays with friends. I don't want him to have that reputation. Not cool. :-(
July 15, 2009
Last night's meeting was great. We came up with a strategy to help Andrés talk to me without forcing the issue. For example, if this behavior occurs again I should tell him that we need to talk when he is ready. I should tell him where I will be when he is ready to talk. He understands that this is to help make life happy for everyone. Also, we talked about the future which has never been discussed. I think it helped him knowing that I was serious about adopting him. He's had a wall up for sure with me. His behavior was so much sweeter with me after the meeting. I'm so glad I asked for help. I feel the stress leaving my shoulders as I type!
Anyway... I gotta figure how to play this video game (tour of duty). It's driving me crazy... it keeps telling me that "I'm stupid." !!!!
Anyway... I gotta figure how to play this video game (tour of duty). It's driving me crazy... it keeps telling me that "I'm stupid." !!!!
July 14, 2009
Great day today just hanging out around the house. A friend and his dog brought over lunch for the two of us. Andrés liked the dog. After that another friend brought over some PS 2 games to keep Andrés busy. What great friends!
No meltdowns today.
Tonight we are going to talk with the Doc about how I can deal with Andrés' little shutdowns...
No meltdowns today.
Tonight we are going to talk with the Doc about how I can deal with Andrés' little shutdowns...
July 13, 2009
Wake up- 10:ooam
OMG! I fractured my ankle at the snow park today. What a mess. I'm in an aircast, on crutches...the pain is insane!
I'm such a dork!
The ambulance ride was kinda fun, though! I don't want to think about how much that 4 min ride is going to cost me! Christina took Andrés to swim at her parent's house while I went to the ER solo. It took a good 5 hours to see a Doc.
So... this is going to force me to slow down. This little accident might be a good thing. Who knows!
Well, I'm really tired. Good night!
OMG! I fractured my ankle at the snow park today. What a mess. I'm in an aircast, on crutches...the pain is insane!
I'm such a dork!
The ambulance ride was kinda fun, though! I don't want to think about how much that 4 min ride is going to cost me! Christina took Andrés to swim at her parent's house while I went to the ER solo. It took a good 5 hours to see a Doc.
So... this is going to force me to slow down. This little accident might be a good thing. Who knows!
Well, I'm really tired. Good night!
July 12, 2009
Wake up- 10:30am
Holy crap. Today was a bust. Total meltdown at the FANA picnic. It was horrible. Andrés took off to the parking lot. He sat in front of my car. Wouldn't talk to me, to my mom, to another adoption mom, to a native Spanish speaking friend....no one. I need help. This isn't cool. We ended up leaving early, but he wouldn't say goodbye to anyone. It was so embarrassing, but more importantly, how do I get this kid to talk to me? I told him to go to his room when he got home. I'm e-mailing the shrink tomorrow for advice.
On the plus side, E.S. was here and he helped clear the air. He was a great distraction and helped Andrés fly a kite, (no pun intended!) we all played can jam and had pizza. Andrew came over too, more as a distraction for me instead of as a reward for Andres. We took a walk and played a few movies before falling asleep.
I know Andres is a good kid. Something just happens and he shuts down. It's better that it's this and not a vocal... screaming, crying outburst. I see the positive side, really! The tension I feel from him just isn't good for either of us. We gotta work it out. Hopefully, tomorrow I'll get some suggestions to try!
Bedtime- who knows!
Holy crap. Today was a bust. Total meltdown at the FANA picnic. It was horrible. Andrés took off to the parking lot. He sat in front of my car. Wouldn't talk to me, to my mom, to another adoption mom, to a native Spanish speaking friend....no one. I need help. This isn't cool. We ended up leaving early, but he wouldn't say goodbye to anyone. It was so embarrassing, but more importantly, how do I get this kid to talk to me? I told him to go to his room when he got home. I'm e-mailing the shrink tomorrow for advice.
On the plus side, E.S. was here and he helped clear the air. He was a great distraction and helped Andrés fly a kite, (no pun intended!) we all played can jam and had pizza. Andrew came over too, more as a distraction for me instead of as a reward for Andres. We took a walk and played a few movies before falling asleep.
I know Andres is a good kid. Something just happens and he shuts down. It's better that it's this and not a vocal... screaming, crying outburst. I see the positive side, really! The tension I feel from him just isn't good for either of us. We gotta work it out. Hopefully, tomorrow I'll get some suggestions to try!
Bedtime- who knows!
July 11, 2009
Wake up= 10pm
We met the Northern families today for a tour of the Power plant, a picnic and a trip to Art Park. The kids had a blast talking to each other and playing the Juanes Cds in my car. The rain put a little damper on the day, but we made the best of it. Art park closed due to a tornado warning. Andrés was hysterical the whole ride home. I really think he was expecting touch down! He asked me where we go if there is a tornado. I told him the basement. Then he asked if we could put my SUV in the basement. It was too funny.
We met Christina's family for a little dinner and soccer action this evening. After that we took a spin to Chris' for a bonfire. It was a nice day. I hope tomorrow is just as nice. Big FANA picnic tomorrow.
Bedtime- 11pm
We met the Northern families today for a tour of the Power plant, a picnic and a trip to Art Park. The kids had a blast talking to each other and playing the Juanes Cds in my car. The rain put a little damper on the day, but we made the best of it. Art park closed due to a tornado warning. Andrés was hysterical the whole ride home. I really think he was expecting touch down! He asked me where we go if there is a tornado. I told him the basement. Then he asked if we could put my SUV in the basement. It was too funny.
We met Christina's family for a little dinner and soccer action this evening. After that we took a spin to Chris' for a bonfire. It was a nice day. I hope tomorrow is just as nice. Big FANA picnic tomorrow.
Bedtime- 11pm
July 10, 2009
Wake up= 9:30am
I stuck to my guns today and didn't go to Fantasy Island as planned. My parents came over for lunch. It was a nice afternoon. Andres washed my car, for fun... not as a punishment. (I swear!!!) For most of the day he played with his cars and toy solders in the backyard. We did go for a short bike ride, too. Honestly, it was a nice day.
In the long run I hope I will think my decision was good. I wouldn't have taken his behavior from a student so... how can I take that from my son? Before dinner I asked him if he had anything to say about his behavior yesterday. He said "sorry". I told him that I am serious in wanting to hear his opinion. I was straight up with making sure he knew I might not agree with what he thinks, but he should feel safe talking to me about his feelings.
I wonder how these issues are dealt with for the non-Spanish speaking families? Maybe because I speak Spanish it makes it worse!
Well, at least today was low key and relaxing. I think I need to have more days like this. It's more like real life anyway...
bedtime= 10pm
I stuck to my guns today and didn't go to Fantasy Island as planned. My parents came over for lunch. It was a nice afternoon. Andres washed my car, for fun... not as a punishment. (I swear!!!) For most of the day he played with his cars and toy solders in the backyard. We did go for a short bike ride, too. Honestly, it was a nice day.
In the long run I hope I will think my decision was good. I wouldn't have taken his behavior from a student so... how can I take that from my son? Before dinner I asked him if he had anything to say about his behavior yesterday. He said "sorry". I told him that I am serious in wanting to hear his opinion. I was straight up with making sure he knew I might not agree with what he thinks, but he should feel safe talking to me about his feelings.
I wonder how these issues are dealt with for the non-Spanish speaking families? Maybe because I speak Spanish it makes it worse!
Well, at least today was low key and relaxing. I think I need to have more days like this. It's more like real life anyway...
bedtime= 10pm
Saturday, August 22, 2009
July 9, 2009
wake up= 10am.
Went swimming with Josh in Wilson. We had a nice time in the pool. After swimming the day went downhill fast! I think the honeymoon phase is OVER! I guess I suck for not being an MTV cribs mom or something...
My feelings are totally hurt. There's no way I'm taking this behavior from him. NO WAY JOSE!
In my heart I want to cancel Fantasy Island tomorrow. I can't deal with my parents and him if he continues acting like this. I feel so much stress right now...
Ok... here's what I'm thinking...
A... He thinks he's on a vacation here and nothing else.
B... He wants more than what I can offer... ex) today he told me that I have a small house.
C... He's being lazy. Doesn't want to walk, talk, be nice, doesn't like to study. Has no hopes, dreams, desires... maybe this is a culture background thing that I am taking the wrong way.??? What ever it is... I hate it.
D... Can I do this alone, effectively? I saw a host dad interact with his son today. I also saw Andres watching the two of them. I saw a little sadness, resentment, something new on his face. Maybe he needs a Dad too. Maybe I can't compete with all of these people. Maybe I can't offer enough...
E... I need to chill and stop stressing.
OMG...what a day.
bedtime= 8:40pm.
Went swimming with Josh in Wilson. We had a nice time in the pool. After swimming the day went downhill fast! I think the honeymoon phase is OVER! I guess I suck for not being an MTV cribs mom or something...
My feelings are totally hurt. There's no way I'm taking this behavior from him. NO WAY JOSE!
In my heart I want to cancel Fantasy Island tomorrow. I can't deal with my parents and him if he continues acting like this. I feel so much stress right now...
Ok... here's what I'm thinking...
A... He thinks he's on a vacation here and nothing else.
B... He wants more than what I can offer... ex) today he told me that I have a small house.
C... He's being lazy. Doesn't want to walk, talk, be nice, doesn't like to study. Has no hopes, dreams, desires... maybe this is a culture background thing that I am taking the wrong way.??? What ever it is... I hate it.
D... Can I do this alone, effectively? I saw a host dad interact with his son today. I also saw Andres watching the two of them. I saw a little sadness, resentment, something new on his face. Maybe he needs a Dad too. Maybe I can't compete with all of these people. Maybe I can't offer enough...
E... I need to chill and stop stressing.
OMG...what a day.
bedtime= 8:40pm.
July 8, 2009
Wake up= 10:15am
We had breakfast and went to the zoo with my parents. First day I saw a big attitude change. There was a lot of tension. Andrés wasn't walking next to me and I could tell my mom wasn't a fan. She didn't need to say anything. I could "feel" it!
Anyway... I wasn't in the mood to say 1,800 times to slow down. For some reason, Andrés just wanted to see one animal and leave. It was weird. He totally lost his "paciencia". After the zoo we picked up Janet and played Wii with the family. Nicole took us to McDonalds and the we all went to CC for videogames. It was super fun. Picking out the prizes wasn't fun. Decisions....decisions...decisions...
He's been watching Happy Feet everyday. It's a super cute movie. I love the little penguins.
Bed Time- 11pmish...
We had breakfast and went to the zoo with my parents. First day I saw a big attitude change. There was a lot of tension. Andrés wasn't walking next to me and I could tell my mom wasn't a fan. She didn't need to say anything. I could "feel" it!
Anyway... I wasn't in the mood to say 1,800 times to slow down. For some reason, Andrés just wanted to see one animal and leave. It was weird. He totally lost his "paciencia". After the zoo we picked up Janet and played Wii with the family. Nicole took us to McDonalds and the we all went to CC for videogames. It was super fun. Picking out the prizes wasn't fun. Decisions....decisions...decisions...
He's been watching Happy Feet everyday. It's a super cute movie. I love the little penguins.
Bed Time- 11pmish...
July 6, 2009
Wake up: 10:30am
We had lunch with my parents today. Andrés loved Chicken Fingers! We went swimming in West Seneca. He's a great swimmer. He's a really good kid. He's nice to the little kids and he listens to me when things were getting a little "wild". He's very respectful. After swimming he got to play soccer with Andrew and co. Nice boys. We had a meeting at BVS at 6pm. It went well. The kids all seemed happy to see one another. I hope they remain friends growing up. What a unique bond to share. We rated today a 10 out of 10.
We had lunch with my parents today. Andrés loved Chicken Fingers! We went swimming in West Seneca. He's a great swimmer. He's a really good kid. He's nice to the little kids and he listens to me when things were getting a little "wild". He's very respectful. After swimming he got to play soccer with Andrew and co. Nice boys. We had a meeting at BVS at 6pm. It went well. The kids all seemed happy to see one another. I hope they remain friends growing up. What a unique bond to share. We rated today a 10 out of 10.
July 7, 2009
Wake up= after 11am
We were in the car FOREVER today. I took Andrés to run some errands. We went to the bank, shoe store, Niagara Street Tops and to Lackawanna to pick up the Colombian guests for dinner. Dinner was awkward for my perspective, to say the least! I felt like I was on being judged on being a Mom. Anyway... drove to OP to return guests. Did a McDonalds run before coming home. Dinner really was a bust! I'm not a Colombian cook, that is for sure. It's been a long day...
Bedtime= after 11pm
We were in the car FOREVER today. I took Andrés to run some errands. We went to the bank, shoe store, Niagara Street Tops and to Lackawanna to pick up the Colombian guests for dinner. Dinner was awkward for my perspective, to say the least! I felt like I was on being judged on being a Mom. Anyway... drove to OP to return guests. Did a McDonalds run before coming home. Dinner really was a bust! I'm not a Colombian cook, that is for sure. It's been a long day...
Bedtime= after 11pm
July 5, 2009
wake up= I forget.
We went to Lisa's for a little g-hero action and rock band. Andrés seemed super bored. I didn't put too much stress on his "boredom" because there was SO much to do and play with there. Stopped at Christina's mom's house. Andrés adores Andrew. Andrew was super nice to him, as was Tyler. We got some great clothes from Christina that Andres' really needed. A lot of the stuff I bought was super big. Well, it will fit when he returns! Watching another movie right now. This is so relaxing!
bedtime- going to be after 11pm, for sure!
We went to Lisa's for a little g-hero action and rock band. Andrés seemed super bored. I didn't put too much stress on his "boredom" because there was SO much to do and play with there. Stopped at Christina's mom's house. Andrés adores Andrew. Andrew was super nice to him, as was Tyler. We got some great clothes from Christina that Andres' really needed. A lot of the stuff I bought was super big. Well, it will fit when he returns! Watching another movie right now. This is so relaxing!
bedtime- going to be after 11pm, for sure!
July 3, 2009
Wake up= 9:30ish
We watched a movie this morning. I did some laundry and we made cards for Aunt Janet's birthday. Party might have been tough for him. He discovered YOU TUBE, rode his bike and didn't eat a whole lot of anything.
Big picture development day! He took pictures of all the food in my house while I was in the shower. When I saw the pictures... it made me sad. Here is a little boy not interested in showing the people/friends back home pictures of the Falls, or the city, but of the food in my cupboards, freezer and fridge. WOW! I'm speechless.
After the party we went to blockbuster to get a movie. Played guitar hero for a while, too. We got a late night invite to Chris' house. So we went there for a bonfire, pizza, fireworks and swimming. The kids were so nice to him.
Bed time= 2:30am
We watched a movie this morning. I did some laundry and we made cards for Aunt Janet's birthday. Party might have been tough for him. He discovered YOU TUBE, rode his bike and didn't eat a whole lot of anything.
Big picture development day! He took pictures of all the food in my house while I was in the shower. When I saw the pictures... it made me sad. Here is a little boy not interested in showing the people/friends back home pictures of the Falls, or the city, but of the food in my cupboards, freezer and fridge. WOW! I'm speechless.
After the party we went to blockbuster to get a movie. Played guitar hero for a while, too. We got a late night invite to Chris' house. So we went there for a bonfire, pizza, fireworks and swimming. The kids were so nice to him.
Bed time= 2:30am
July 2, 2009
Wake up time= 7:15ish...
Woke up to hearing Kristie tell Andrés "I don't know what you are saying". After a few times of listening to that I realized I had to get up and translate!
First day was jammed packed. He was so excited to meet Willa, my mom's dog. I think she was a disappointment. She is so afraid of people. She still barks at me! We had lunch with another summer host family at the Silo in Lewiston. Then, a quick tour of Niagara Falls, "coffee talk" at Tim Hortons. He really ordered coffee too. I guess it's ok, he is Colombian, right? He's 12 though. I wonder if that was ok?
Anyway... we rode bikes and took off to Grand Island for some swimming at the "Hotel...Motel.. Holiday Inn"! He likes my music, too!
I can't believe we did all this today. What was I thinking?
Bedtime= 12:20am
Woke up to hearing Kristie tell Andrés "I don't know what you are saying". After a few times of listening to that I realized I had to get up and translate!
First day was jammed packed. He was so excited to meet Willa, my mom's dog. I think she was a disappointment. She is so afraid of people. She still barks at me! We had lunch with another summer host family at the Silo in Lewiston. Then, a quick tour of Niagara Falls, "coffee talk" at Tim Hortons. He really ordered coffee too. I guess it's ok, he is Colombian, right? He's 12 though. I wonder if that was ok?
Anyway... we rode bikes and took off to Grand Island for some swimming at the "Hotel...Motel.. Holiday Inn"! He likes my music, too!
I can't believe we did all this today. What was I thinking?
Bedtime= 12:20am
July 1, 2009
Andrés is here! He seems so small to me! Flight was super late arriving into BUFF. Took a tour of the house, ate some cereal, watched Shrek in Spanish, met Kristie and fell asleep on the sofa!
Bedtime= 2:30am
Bedtime= 2:30am
Saturday, July 4, 2009
July 4, 2009
Wake up= after 10:50am.
We went to the dollar store today because Andrés wanted to buy some toy cars. We stopped at a fellow "summer magic" family's home for a BBQ. Andrés was having a hard time.
After the BBQ we went to UB for fireworks. I forgot food. Lesson #1 in packing a "bag".
We are watching a movie now.
Bedtime= after midnight.
We went to the dollar store today because Andrés wanted to buy some toy cars. We stopped at a fellow "summer magic" family's home for a BBQ. Andrés was having a hard time.
After the BBQ we went to UB for fireworks. I forgot food. Lesson #1 in packing a "bag".
We are watching a movie now.
Bedtime= after midnight.
Saturday, March 28, 2009
March 28, 2009
Updates... sent in paperwork! Just waiting for fingerprint cards and a call to set up the home study. I feel like I should study for the home study! Other than this... not much more to report. Oh! I've been in contact with two other families planning on participating this summer, too. Very cool people!
Friday, March 20, 2009
March 20, 2009
I am going through a gamete of emotion right now. Can I do this? Am I certifiably crazy for even thinking to ask for a home study? Will I be good at parenting a stranger between the ages of 8-12? I feel silly thinking about steps x,y,z when step "c" isn't even reality yet! How do I proceed without thinking of EVERYTHING? What kind of parent am I? How would I set the rules, limits, and lines to be drawn? How will my child see the need to respect my rules, ideas and non-negotiable ways of life?
I spoke with a couple, who are in the Colombian process as I type. We had a great conversation. I point blank asked them everything. They assured me that the background given was accurate and the kids come here with a huge support group. They keep an eye out for us and for the kids. The Colombian government doesn't want this to fail. So... they take this program seriously.
We spoke about some other issues which I won't blog about. Sometimes people just say what you know is true in your heart, but you can't hear your heart until someone turns up the volume for you. I'm so happy I called them! Good move!
I spoke with a couple, who are in the Colombian process as I type. We had a great conversation. I point blank asked them everything. They assured me that the background given was accurate and the kids come here with a huge support group. They keep an eye out for us and for the kids. The Colombian government doesn't want this to fail. So... they take this program seriously.
We spoke about some other issues which I won't blog about. Sometimes people just say what you know is true in your heart, but you can't hear your heart until someone turns up the volume for you. I'm so happy I called them! Good move!
Friday, March 13, 2009
March 13, 2009
I spoke with a dear friend in detail about my thoughts and concerns. He is a very cautious man. Negative at times, but in a polite way. His concerns were more for me not getting hurt, I assume. He encouraged me to talk to more people in the program. If possible, to the kids in the program from years past. We talked about the diversity in Colombia about the kids that sniff glue to the kids who grow up in the country clubs. Good talk!
Wednesday, March 11, 2009
March 11, 2009
BVS informational meeting today! In all honesty, I didn't want to go alone. I was scared. I asked my mom. She was ecstatic! On a side note, my mom should have been a detective. She knows what to ask, when to ask it, and how to listen for BS. She was a great choice! The ride to Lackawanna was memorable. I shared with her my concerns, curiosities, and hopes. She shared with me her excitement and her fear of the language barriers. The meeting was informal yet very informational. Every detail I wanted to ask, I asked. Laura talked about the background of the kids, their health on a physical, mental and emotional level. She explained the paperwork, INS forms, and other documentation. She gave me a price list! A broken down figure of how much I need and when I will need it! We watched news footage of last year's group. We left with my mom crying. There was so much information in my brain. I needed an outlet. I turned to eating. Something I haven't done in over 2 and a half years. It made me sick! Lesson re-learned. Hopefully lesson not forgotten!
Saturday, February 28, 2009
Feb. 28, 2009
Here I am sitting in my living room wondering how my life took a very unexpected turn. I am actually going to try to adopt an "older" Colombian child.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
February 28th 2009 is the day it happened. I attended a Western NY Foreign Language Educators Conference with 2 co workers. During the conference I sat in on some workshops and perused several vendors, textbook sales reps, and a few social rights groups. Nothing caught my attention except the outrageous prices of home made jewelry and some screen print t-shirts!
During the first workshop, Jen (co-worker) passed over a newspaper article from an adoption service at the conference. She whispered, "Linda, this would solve your day care dilemma!" I read the byline and laughed aloud, as for some reason I complain all the time to Jen about the skyrocketing cost of daycare. I don't even have kids, but I have a big beef with the cost.
The idea of "having" a school aged child never entered my mind before! Needless to say, my curiosity got the best of me so... I stopped listening to the presenter and actually read the article. OH MY GOD! The story captured my mind, touched my heart and warmed my soul. Here were these (amazingly) strong kids, dressed in little orphan uniforms, looking into the camera with glistening eyes hoping to catch the glance of someone willing to just love them. After the workshop session, I returned to the BVS table to read more about their program, take the "free stuff" and smile at the lady (Laura) behind the table. I asked her a few questions about the program, the kids, about being single, about living on a teacher salary, etc...
We left the conference. I picked my Mom up for lunch and to visit Grandma. As soon as my mom got into the car I shoved the papers in her lap. After reading them she looked at me and said "You know, I always thought you'd do something like this, Lin." She said some other things, which will remain private. Needless to say, they were very touching. My mom's support was all I needed to make another contact with BVS and talk about the "real" stuff.
In the meantime I started worrying about who these kids were in the orphanage? Why are they there? Whey weren't they adopted at a younger age? How long have they been there? How much will this really cost me? These questions were mind consuming. When I ran, I thought about them. When I ate, I thought about them. When I was was trying to fall asleep, I thought about them. When I was teaching, I thought about them. My thoughts were almost obsessive and out of control! I was self diagnosed with ADD unless it was about adoption.
Before attending the informational meeting, I told 5 friends outside of my immediate family that I was considering this. Every single one of these friends had some kind of positive reaction. If not about the kids in the program then about the idea of just considering the program. These friends I told were planned out for a reason. They are the listeners and the thinkers in my life. In distinctive and unique ways they are all super bright people that I am blessed to have in my life. Some of these friends are very old and some of them are very new. Some like to listen, absorb and ponder while others have an opinion before hearing the entire story. These friends helped me reach new levels of thinking, questioning, and mind mapping. I hope they will continue to play a roll in this adventure...
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
February 28th 2009 is the day it happened. I attended a Western NY Foreign Language Educators Conference with 2 co workers. During the conference I sat in on some workshops and perused several vendors, textbook sales reps, and a few social rights groups. Nothing caught my attention except the outrageous prices of home made jewelry and some screen print t-shirts!
During the first workshop, Jen (co-worker) passed over a newspaper article from an adoption service at the conference. She whispered, "Linda, this would solve your day care dilemma!" I read the byline and laughed aloud, as for some reason I complain all the time to Jen about the skyrocketing cost of daycare. I don't even have kids, but I have a big beef with the cost.
The idea of "having" a school aged child never entered my mind before! Needless to say, my curiosity got the best of me so... I stopped listening to the presenter and actually read the article. OH MY GOD! The story captured my mind, touched my heart and warmed my soul. Here were these (amazingly) strong kids, dressed in little orphan uniforms, looking into the camera with glistening eyes hoping to catch the glance of someone willing to just love them. After the workshop session, I returned to the BVS table to read more about their program, take the "free stuff" and smile at the lady (Laura) behind the table. I asked her a few questions about the program, the kids, about being single, about living on a teacher salary, etc...
We left the conference. I picked my Mom up for lunch and to visit Grandma. As soon as my mom got into the car I shoved the papers in her lap. After reading them she looked at me and said "You know, I always thought you'd do something like this, Lin." She said some other things, which will remain private. Needless to say, they were very touching. My mom's support was all I needed to make another contact with BVS and talk about the "real" stuff.
In the meantime I started worrying about who these kids were in the orphanage? Why are they there? Whey weren't they adopted at a younger age? How long have they been there? How much will this really cost me? These questions were mind consuming. When I ran, I thought about them. When I ate, I thought about them. When I was was trying to fall asleep, I thought about them. When I was teaching, I thought about them. My thoughts were almost obsessive and out of control! I was self diagnosed with ADD unless it was about adoption.
Before attending the informational meeting, I told 5 friends outside of my immediate family that I was considering this. Every single one of these friends had some kind of positive reaction. If not about the kids in the program then about the idea of just considering the program. These friends I told were planned out for a reason. They are the listeners and the thinkers in my life. In distinctive and unique ways they are all super bright people that I am blessed to have in my life. Some of these friends are very old and some of them are very new. Some like to listen, absorb and ponder while others have an opinion before hearing the entire story. These friends helped me reach new levels of thinking, questioning, and mind mapping. I hope they will continue to play a roll in this adventure...
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